Home....

I'm home and I'm happy :)

Another week, where it's just one week....

Do I dare write this? I want to shout it from the rooftops, but I'm unsure if I can muster up the courage. My flight date is next Tuesday. Come the 15^th April I might actually be getting on the plane to go back to where I call home. I know I have written many posts like this in the past so you might not believe me. I don’t know if I believe myself.

All bags are packed (and have been since Feb), my DIRE (residency card) and the letter for that are tightly together with my plane ticket and passport. I have a one-way ticket so going to be 100% in God’s hands for my return date. This is it. Wow. Still get nervous saying it. Not more GP visits, no more hospital stays. No more emergencies. All tropical illnesses are gone and I am getting stronger, and fatter. :)

This has been the craziest New-Year I have ever experienced, but I survived and have come out of the whole thing praising God once again for His goodness and faithfulness.

Pemba has recently been struck by a cyclone, the devastation from that has been horrific. People have sadly died from their houses falling on them during the night and many have lost every possession they had. Iris has opened up their church building for people to sleep in and are working with those locally to rebuild their houses and provide food.

Please be praying for Iris and the locals during this time. Pray for those suffering after losing loved ones and that disease that can come from flooding stay far away! Many have been getting dengue fever and malaria since the rivers and puddles have provided a perfect environment for mosquitoes.  

Ready to hit the ground running, ready to see my babies and friends from the villages again, ready to see my Iris family. I am even ready for rice and beans again. After just over 5 months, I am ready. I am surrendered to God, I willingly have given my live to him. I trust in His timing, and I am excited for the possibility that next week will be it!

Please pray for me during my traveling, that everything will run smoothly. Come the end of May I have to renew my DIRE once again, which is quite a big cost. So prayer for provision would be lovely. As well as continued good health and strength for this next season.

Thank you once again for all those who pray for me and cheer me on. I couldn’t do this without you all, who I call my family.

What a beautiful View...

When I was in hospital, I was on a ward that had a great view of the Kingston area and beyond. The window was wide and we were high up on the 7^th floor, higher than any surrounding buildings. It became a great talking point for any visitor. I was on very strong antibiotics and painkillers, trying to get over the operation. To say I wasn’t very sociable was an understatement. Each time the nurse came to me, or I lost my lunch…’oh what an amazing view’ was announced by any around. Those who came each day got to know that view of by heart. It became very comical. 

It was also a great view for me at night-time when I was kept awake by fellow patients. The lights shinning bright from the streets near and far. I love views of cities at night-time. 

One of the first things I did when I was starting to walk once again was to check out the view properly. It really was amazing and a great distraction from the pain standing was bringing.

Tomorrow marks two weeks since I smelt the sweet freedom of the outside world of the hospital. Much progress has happened; I’m walking around, in less daily pain. I’m down to one bandage and my stomach muscles are coming back! You never know how much you need them until you loose them! In this physical healing there has been emotional healing as well. When a lot has been lost, you have to choose faith more than ever before. You have to battle the flesh to receive what God has for you. This has caused many times of falling over, but God picks me up every time.

‘Blessed are those who are poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of God’. (Matthew 5)

I once had to write an essay in my missions school back in 2007. We had to choose our favorite beatitude and say why. I chose that one without really understanding it. I just liked the reward to be truthful. I looked at all the beatitudes and saw what each one reaped, and this one looked like the best. So, while I wrote the essay I asked God to make me poor in spirit.

I now understand it.

This season has allowed me to understand what being poor in spirit really looks like. God is the only way. I'm in a place where I had lost control of many things in my life. I couldn’t bath myself, go as I please, use my phone to communicate or choose when I would like to leave for Pemba. But that view. It was beautiful. As I sat there in my bed, trying to process those last 6 weeks. Two operations, taken to hospital 4 times as emergency, changing my ticket three times, loosing much money in the process, loosing time with many loved ones while in England and not being able to get back to Pemba. My faith was the only thing that got me through it. He loved me through it, he saved my life, he sent the right people at the right time and gave me the best view in the hospital. He is my hero.

'I can do all things in Christ who strengthens me'

Without God I am nothing. I am thankful God has taught me this through such a whirlwind of a season. What a reward to gain. I am all about those rewards in God! :) To loose all is to gain everything. May I keep on learning.

In Christ alone my hope is found,

He is my light, my strength, my song;

this Cornerstone, this solid Ground,

firm through the fiercest drought and storm.

What heights of love, what depths of peace,

when fears are stilled, when strivings cease!

My Comforter, my All in All,

here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone! who took on flesh

Fulness of God in helpless babe!

This gift of love and righteousness

Scorned by the ones he came to save:

Till on that cross as Jesus died,

The wrath of God was satisfied -

For every sin on Him was laid;

Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay

Light of the world by darkness slain:

Then bursting forth in glorious Day

Up from the grave he rose again!

And as He stands in victory

Sin's curse has lost its grip on me,

For I am His and He is mine -

Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,

This is the power of Christ in me;

From life's first cry to final breath.

Jesus commands my destiny.

No power of hell, no scheme of man,

Can ever pluck me from His hand;

Till He returns or calls me home,

Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.

Hot mess...running to Him.

Well….once again my return back to Pemba has been delayed. I was taken into A&E 4 days before I was due to fly with the same pain in my stomach that I had before, and after two days of tests and observations I was taken into emergency surgery with a burst appendix. This surgery was meant to be keyhole but they ended up having to open me up as it was more complicated than they thought.

I am once again back at my parents recovering from this operation. No surgeon was able to say how long this will take but I am leaning and trusting on God for His true timing. Pemba is still my home and I am looking forward to when I am better and I can feel the red dirt in-between my toes once again.

I am going to be honest with you, I have faced many emotions through this whole thing. 2014 hasn’t been the easiest start of any year and I am feeling a bit battered and bruised. When I went into the surgery I was feeling very peaceful up to the point when they were putting me to sleep. I started to get nervous as it became more realistic that this was actually happening. I turned to God and ask for help. He reassured me that He was with me and gave me the song ‘I surrender all’.

Surrendering all to Him looks like many different things and can be done in many ways. But the end goal is the same. Giving it ALL to Him. I can’t say I have understood this season very much but I am surrendering the need to and learning to trust more. I haven’t been very strong physically these past few months but He is strong in me. So I am surrendering to Him and leaning on Him and His joy. Emotionally I am struggling with homesickness, but every day is an adventure with Him and that’s the life I want to surrender to. I want to give it all and have a life completely devoted to Him.

When I read the bible of people like Esther, David, John the Baptist and Moses I get a spring in my step of excitement as the deep friendship they have with God is shown through each verse. As they walk their lives with God, as He leads them into new places you read about the joys and the miracles and the love that comes out of giving it all and going for what He has.

May I never feel happy with the amount I have surrendered to God. May I never keep anything back from Him, but instead run deeper and deeper into His love and friendship.

My time in the UK from ruth Alexander on Vimeo.

One week...

One week!!! As I sit here writing this I have one week until I fly. One week left of hot showers and comfy beds without mosquito nets. One week of good nutritious food and good coffee. One week until I get to see my babies again. One week until I get to minister on the streets again with my friends. One week until I see my Iris family again. One week until I leave for home.  

I really appreciate your prayers during this time. Not only for me but for those in Pemba at the moment. They have all been through quite a tough season, so would be lovely if you can raise them up in prayer. 

Please do keep in touch while I am back home. Would love to continue hearing what you are all up to and what God is doing in your lives! 

It was wonderful seeing some of you face to face while I was in England....thank you for your kindness, hospitality and the love and prayers that was poured into me while I was resting, recovering and getting filled up before being sent back out. 

For now...excitement as I spend my birthday packing and getting on an airplane. This valentines day is going to be an adventure with my sweet Jesus.  

Love and prayers,

Ruth 

Back I go again…

Saturday morning I wake up with a slight bruised feeling, however seeing as I sleep with many covers, waking up feeling squashed isn’t a new thing. As the day went on the pain became less bruised and more…well…pain. It was more located in one place and moving around became more difficult. So…back I go. I am hospitalised once again with an expected appendicitis.

As I traveled to hospital with the worship music blaring I was clinging on to God with all I had. I was not going to go through another operation, for my return date to Pemba to be delayed even longer. I just couldn’t do it. The day before I had just finished packing, I was ready to leave. Having an operation wasn’t an option. No No No!

I phoned and messaged people to get the message out to pray. I asked my family in Christ to rise up with me in prayer against this. And it was beautiful to watch those prayers come into being. I was out two days later with the doctors unable to say what the pain and sickness was, but happy it wasn’t my appendix. I am feeling much better and resting well at home.

For now…No more going to hospital please! Being admitted three times plus two appointments, before the end of January isn’t a great way of starting 2014.

I was slightly embarrassed to be returning to the same place so soon, one of the surgeons recognised me straight away. I was even more embarrassed with the effect the morphine had on me. The doctor wasn’t too sure what to say when I told him I lived in a bamboo hut. Thankfully my mother was there to correct all the questions the doctor asked me about my living conditions in England. Seriously….why ask me anything when I have just had powerful pain killers? I get weird when I am ill without the drugs, as my friends and family well know. I even had a message from one of my dear friends asking me to message her as soon as I have had the painkillers. I think she knew she would get some entertainment. :)

I could repeat all I wrote on the last blog entry when I left the hospital last time. I still know I am in God’s hands with all I do, as He leads. I also know I am in a spiritual warfare and praying matters. Fighting with intercession is a needed part of everyday life. The more I placed my focus on worship as I was traveling to the hospital, the more peace and joy took over. I knew I would be ok in His hands, whatever happens. I am ok. He is still good and I am still His daughter. I wasn’t alone.

Praise God for all He is in the everyday things.

Never give up...