21 days....

It was the last week of November, I was in my sister’s house near Heathrow with my bags packed, ready to go back to Jackson at any moment. My life had been turned upside down and had been put on hold. I knew what God was saying, but every path had a big brick wall at the end of it. I knew I was to go back to Jackson but I didn’t know how. I clunged onto God and His truth, fighting every lie and accusation with worship. My mind was focused on the moment by moment, not planning anything for the next day. My God, however, was thinking ahead. One morning while I was putting on my make-up, God said, ‘I want you to fast make-up for the 21 day fast in January, you are going to learn how to be a pure and spotless bride.’

Perfect skin is something I do not have, and make up is something so useful to cover this up. Putting colour in my skin, creating a better tone. Without it, I am anything but pure and spotless. However, God was using this physical fast, to do something in the spiritual.

The learning in the spiritual didn’t start in January, but on the 21^st November. When this season of crazy started. Bit by bit, God has shown me how to be a Bride of Christ. He has shown me how He is walking with me, holding my hand through every storm and every battle.

He is teaching me more of who I am, and all I have access to. I have been told 'no' by authorities of this earth. But my God says ‘Yes'. My God has all the authority, and I know I am going to see a miracle. I know that He is fighting on my behalf. (2 Chronicles 20)

I am here with no ‘Plan B’. God must show up or I have nothing. This is the best place to be in! I am delighted that He is in charge and I get to walk hand in hand with Him. I love that He is my strength and I don’t have to look elsewhere.

‘When I look at you, looking at me, I know just who I’m meant to be;

It’s who I am

Unafraid

Unashamed

Immovable

Unshakable

It’s who I am’

Stephanie Gretzinger/Bethel Music

He is teaching me who I am as the Bride of Christ, teaching me to walk up-right and bold. He is showing me all that is for me in the Heavens, opening my eyes to the possibilities when following Him. He is stretching my expectations. 

While reading Luke ch1, I discovered that Zechariah's time in the 'Holy of Holy' places was a once in a life time event for him, due to the amount of priests in the area. During this, he had an angel come and give him a message from God, to say that his wife is going to get pregnant in her old age. He asked a very simple question - 'Will there be a sign?' 

From this he was silenced. Doubt was silenced until faith arose again. He was silenced until he saw the miracle he was told was going to happen. Until his son was born.

If only he went in with an expectant heart, knowing that all things are possible. If only he didn't need to see the miracle in the physical to believe it was happening. 

God is teaching me to walk in complete faith, silencing fears and lies. Revealing all that faith and patience brings - The promises of Him. (Hebrews 6v12) For He is faithful. 

Thank you for your faithful prayers for me in this season. I know God has already won this battle for me, and I know that I will be going back to Jackson soon. Keep praying for that miracle!