Learning to purely love....

In my weariness I realised that I wasn't loving purely. That there was more. That it was about loving others just he loves. That in the overflow of learning how much He loves me, I get to love others just like that. It's learning to have a soft heart towards Him, so I can have a soft heart towards others. That I get to 'Love the Lord my God with all of my heart, mind, soul and strength' and from there I get to 'Love my neighbour as I love myself'. 

These last couple of months I have had so many opportunities to purely love in crazy hard moments. But it wasn't just done in the learning to see people how He sees them, but in learning to see how He sees me as well. The more that I learn who I am in Him, the more I get to be entwined as one with the Lord. 


June Update - We Will Go! from ruth Alexander on Vimeo.

Fearless Faith

Psalm 27

David’s poetic praise to God before he was anointed king

 

The Lord is my revelation-light to guide me along the way;

    he’s the source of my salvation to defend me every day.

    I fear no one!

    I’ll never turn back and run from you, Lord;

    surround and protect me.

 

When evil ones come to destroy me,

    they will be the ones who turn back.

 

My heart will not be afraid even if an army rises to attack.

    I know that you are there for me, so I will not be shaken.

 

Here’s the one thing I crave from God,

    the one thing I seek above all else:

    I want the privilege of living with him every moment in his house,

    finding the sweet loveliness of his face,

    filled with awe, delighting in his glory and grace.

    I want to live my life so close to him

    that he takes pleasure in my every prayer.

 

In his shelter in the day of trouble, that’s where you’ll find me,

    for he hides me there in his holiness.

    He has smuggled me into his secret place,

    where I’m kept safe and secure—

    out of reach from all my enemies.

    Triumphant now, I’ll bring him my offerings of praise,

    singing and shouting with ecstatic joy!

    Yes, listen and you can hear

    the fanfare of my shouts of praise to the Lord!

 

God, hear my cry. Show me your grace.

    Show me mercy, and send the help I need!

 

Lord, when you said to me, “Seek my face,”

    my inner being responded,

    “I’m seeking your face with all my heart.”

 

So don’t hide yourself, Lord, when I come to find you.

    You’re the God of my salvation;

    how can you reject your servant in anger?

    You’ve been my only hope,

    so don’t forsake me now when I need you!

 

My father and mother abandoned me. I’m like an orphan!

    But you took me in and made me yours.

 

Now teach me all about your ways and tell me what to do.

    Make it clear for me to understand,

    for I am surrounded by waiting enemies.

 

Don’t let them defeat me, Lord.

    You can’t let me fall into their clutches!

    They keep accusing me of things I’ve never done

    while they plot evil against me. 

Yet I totally trust you to rescue me one more time,

    so that I can see once again how good you are while I’m still alive!

 

Here’s what I’ve learned through it all:

    Don’t give up; don’t be impatient;

    be entwined as one with the Lord.

    Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope.

    Yes, keep on waiting—for he will never disappoint you!

Fear cannot stand to His great name, Victory was born when the lamb was slain…

(Title from Kingdom Culture Worship) 

There has been so many times that I have wondered at His great love. I have marvelled and almost can’t believe that God would love me to the extent that He does. The deeper I walk into His love, the more it changes me. God blows me away time and time again as He shows me His power and might through pure love. His name alone can move mountains and tell fear to leave.  

It is because of this that I stand on His great love and all who He is. 

We have about ten children from ages 10 – 13 that come in faithfully, and I have had the privilege to be with them twice a week during the after school program. (The Fountain) One young man is new to me since returning back from England. He is the life of most rooms and doesn’t fail to make me laugh. I have seen a huge change in Him since being back. He used to need one on one help, just so the whole room could function. Now, he helps me and joins in with what the whole room is doing. 

This is because of God’s great love. 

A while ago this boy asked everyone around “Do you love me?” or “why do you keep saying that you love me?”. This very thing was so new to Him and he was on the path to discovery of what love looks like. 

Last week I went to this boy’s graduation from 5^thgrade to 6^th. At the end of the whole presentation the head master of the school stood up and said ‘this boy has been asking every teacher, “why don’t you say you love me?, we love you!” and we never had an answer. But today we say to you, all of you, we love you’. 

This young man learnt what love looked like and took it to his school. He discovered that love is something you can have in every relationship and it’s needed! He saw a lack and questioned it. 

I cry when writing this, as this is a huge thing. This young man is just one of many we get to see daily, and God changed Him with His love. So he took it and changed his school. This neighbourhood is a fatherless neighbourhood. The family dynamics are such that our kids don’t get what they daily need. (Acceptance, focused attention, guidance and protection). There is so much need that I would get overwhelmed daily if I decided to carry it. 

Yet, it is His and I trust Him. 

I trust Him with the children daily to teach, guide, love on and pull in deeper. They are His and I get to join in for the ride. When you see things like kids taking pure love to the schools, it makes everything so worth it! 

There was a moment last week where I did feel overwhelmed, as I prayed for wisdom and guidance in it all. I prayed to be a good leader like King David, who did seek God in all things, and was great at repentance. But most of all, He did everything out of worship to God. I asked God for the guidance from Him. He gave me Psalm 27 and it blew me away as I read it with new eyesight.

What I want to leave you with today is the last part. As we all have the one person we are praying for, for the love of Jesus to touch them today. For God’s love to change a situations and places. We all need His love to change us too! 

‘Here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Don’t give up; Don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave, courageous, and never loose hope. Yes, keep on waiting – for He will never disappoint you!’ 

Psalm 27v14

New Perspective....

It has been a beautiful time since returning. There have been moments where I have just sat and cried, as I take it all in. Feeling overwhelmed with how privileged I am to be back. I rejoice in all the miracles God did to get me back here. The first week I got back I was asked to speak in the gym. I spoke about doing all things with Jesus, asking Him to help you reach those dreams and desires that God has placed in you. I had about 20 young men looking at me silently listening, which is huge! I got to tell them that I have my deepest desire, and that was to be with God in where He wants me. Which is right here with them. With God we will always succeed, but without him we will fail.

One of the guys, who used to only swear at me when he did decided to talk to me, stayed to thank me before he left. That is a big victory! 

God took me to Daniel 3 one night as we were worshiping. We were praying for the night life in Jackson. God showed me that Shedrach, Meshach and Abednego were in a very vulnerable place. They must have seen so many turn away from God due to fear. They were called by the King because they wouldn't bow down to his god. They knew the likely answer to what was about to happen, yet they stand so strong in their Faith. The King then orders the furnace to be heated 7 times hotter than normal. However, Shedrach, Meshach and Abednego don't worry or freet but stay so grounded in the truth. They have the faith that God could have saved them before being thrown in the fire, yet He doesn't. Something much more amazing happens. They see Jesus in the fire, which grabs the attention of the king. This then leads to the whole kingdom turning back to God!

They truly had nothing to worry about and walked so firm in their faith! 

What level is my Faith at? Will anything look so hopeless that it doesn't fall under who God is? Where is my perspective?

Since being back, hard stuff has happened. A dear friend ends up on the street after being placed in prison for a night. He has the mind of a child and his basic human needs are not being met. So, he knocks on my door every day and night to receive love. He sleeps  under my house as he knows he is safe.

Do I think his situation is useless? Do I go down the track that he isn't saveable? To do so, I would have to forget all I have seen God do already in my 30 years of life. Plus, all I have read of His word.

So I go and love again and again and again. I pray and cry out for my friend. I speak truth and ask God for a miracle.

I get to receive new perspectives.

A few days after God showed me the passage in Daniel, I was in our outdoor pavilion having church. I was standing with our kids, talking to them about worship and why we do it. Their attention span wasn't long that day and it wasn't easy. I had to really press into the worship myself, asking God to help me.

The worship leader started singing 'I won't relent'. He went over and over the words 'I don't want to talk about you, like you're not in the room. I want to look right at you, I want to sing right to you.' At that point God placed my attention on one of the little boys. He made me aware that He is present in the room, through the people around me. 

Matthew 25v35-40. When I fed the hungry, I fed Him. And when I clothe someone in need, I clothe Him. 

I get to walk in the desires of my heart, which is to be with God in all things. Then in that, I get to love on the people that He sends as if it was God standing in front of me.

He is changing my perspective on things. 

The more He changes my perspective from hopelessness, to truth, the more I see Him.

This photo took my attention this last week. It is pictures of the ocean layered over each other. The photographer took this idea from Psalm 23. When I first looked at it, it looked like it was under water. However, when you look closely, you can see it is above water. When you see your hopeless situations it can be like you're drowning. But when you remember that the Lord is your shepherd, you know you are walking above it.
Photo Cred: Kylie Roberson

He is good...

Last week was Spring Break. This is usually our busiest week out of the year, and I love it! I was sad to be missing it, but Jesus showed me so much of His heart for the week.

He took me to the miracle of the feeding of the 5000. I have to admit, sometimes my mind gets full with trying to organise things when we have any more then 40 people come. It means lots more things have to be put in place and housing has to be very orgainised so no one is sleeping floor. I do love it when our house it full, and it gives me so much joy! But I can fall into panic too easily. 

But then I look at His truth.

In His word, 5000 people showed up and these 12 very ordinary men are asked to feed them. I don’t blame them for questioning Jesus about it, as it seemed so impossible when you look at it through the what the world is like without God. Yet, Jesus was standing right there, so why doubt? They were in the process of learning the true reality of Gods goodness and love. His love that feeds His people daily.

We then know the rest of this amazing testimony. The disciples found 5 loaves and two fish and fed the crowd of thousands. They did it through faith and with Jesus.

We averaged about 60 people per day last week. Teams from churches, youth groups and individuals, coming to serve Jesus alongside us in Downtown, Jackson. It was a beautiful opportunity to see Jesus feed these amazing volunteers. My prayer was for multiplication of His presence throughout Jackson and that each person takes their focus off the world and on to Jesus, listening to His truth. This prayer all came out from God talking to me about 'The feeding of the 5000'. 

Jesus then blessed me with a miracle to start the week. Each team met on the 11^th at church for our weekly time of worship, word and breaking bread together in the form of a meal at the end of the service. An amazing team that we know well brought the food, and wasn’t quite aware how many people were going to be there! Panic started to arise in those who were hungry. There was very clearly not going to be enough food for everyone. Yet everyone prayed and the food was handed out. 

You might have already guessed the end of this story. The food was multiplied, each person got a whole plateful. Plus, there was two boxes of chicken leftover!

God is the God of miracles and I am so thankful for Him. For His faithfulness and kindness to us all. Today I am walking in a miracle and I am going to leave for London to then fly to Jackson tomorrow morning. I am going! This day has finally arrived and I am so thankful!

Thank you again to everyone who has prayed for me and has encouraged me! So much has been learnt in this journey and quitting wasn’t an option! (Although I had days where I felt like I wanted to – just being honest!) Having a family around me is such an overwhelming thing. I am a very blessed lady.

I will let you all know once I am there safe and sound. I will also keep updating this blog once I am back. 

Praying for you all! 

Back to the basics...

In the very beginning, God created the earth and the Heavens. He did it. He created everything. Sometimes I forget this.

God created us

Once God formed us with His hands, in His own image, He breathed His breath into us. We are part of Him. We are His children, we are His bride.

He then gave us authority over everything and told us to multiply. He didn’t create us to stay the same, but to multiply. To grow and to explore all that He has given us.

We then chose against Him, and listened to the snake that only held evil, lies and manipulation. Those for which, God didn’t create us for. They are not part of His image. We forgot who we were and all the good we are partaking in, as we walk in His divine nature.

So what was God’s plan to redeem everything we had lost? To give everything once again, He gave Himself, He gave Jesus. Jesus poured all He had out, crying blood as He cried out to forgive us, for we don’t know what we are doing. Then it was finished. He did it. He made a way for us to get back to having no space between us and God. We get to live in total freedom as we repent and give all of ourselves back to Him. We get to live in His joy even in suffering and His peace through war.

This season has been a time of God taking me back to basics. I am not saying God did all that happened, but I know He was with me as the amazing husband he is, I know He was still in control. Plus, I know He wasn’t going to let the time go by without me learning more about Him! To go deeper into His presence! I pray that not a day goes by that this happens! May I always hang onto Him, whether it is hard or not.

He has reminded me that He is the creator and He gets to go before me.

The first thing He did after He created human, was to have a Sabbath, He rested. I don’t believe He needed to rest, but He wanted to be that example to Adam, to live in His resting place. May that first day be the standard in everything.

God has shown me how to be so rooted in Him, that chaos cannot shake me. That lies and accusations cannot move me out of His truth. That intimacy and peace with God always go together. He is the King of peace, truth and love. I get to live in that place, even when I am currently in a fallen world.

As you can appreciate, I can’t give all details of Tuesday on my very public blog, so do ask me if you would like to know the miracle God did. But what I can say is that I saw a miracle happen right in front of me. I saw Gods promises fulfilled and His light shine bright. I saw all accusations that were said about me disappear and His truth manifest.

He created me. He is in charge. And I get to participate in His divine nature.

It is a gift and a wonder.

When I woke up on Tuesday morning, before getting ready to go to the embassy I asked Jesus what His word for today is and I opened my bible to search what He was going to give me. But I didn’t have to. I opened the bible right on what He wanted me to read – 2 Chronicles 20. This has been the chapter God has taken me back to since November.

God had already won the battle for me, and I got to walk into everything with His victory!

We get to be victorious because of His victories! Blows my mind!

Thank you to everyone that prayed! I have been overwhelmed with how many have been part of this journey with me! People that I have never met, letting me know that they pray for me regularly. I love the body of Christ and I really couldn’t do it without all of you!

I hope to be back by the end of next week, depending on when I receive my passport back. I am beyond excited to see everyone again! I just hope I'm understood, as my English accent has come back very strong!

In the wondering...

In the wondering... from ruth Alexander on Vimeo.

The week's deadline had started. I was getting nervous and the peace was leaving. This time next week is a big day in this whole process. 

I messaged my friend and asked her if she would consider coming with me, mentioning that I was nervous. The next day I woke up to a message from her, that contained what I call a 'slap around the face'. It was so good and just what I needed. She reminded me that I am a daughter of the high king, and that I don't have to walk in the nerves and let the enemy steal my peace. It allowed me to shift out of that place, and into the knowledge that I am held by my Heavenly father. 

I get to live solely in His word and truth.

She is going to come with me, and so is Jesus.

His word is enough. 

11 All at once an angel of the Lord appeared to him, standing just to the right of the altar of incense. 12 Zechariah was startled and overwhelmed with fear. 13 But the angel reassured him, saying, “Don’t be afraid, Zechariah! God is showing grace to you. For I have come to tell you that your prayer for a child has been answered. Your wife, Elizabeth, will bear you a son and you are to name him John. 14 His birth will bring you much joy and gladness. Many will rejoice because of him. 15 He will be one of the great ones in the sight of God. He will drink no wine or strong drink, but he will be filled with the Holy Spirit even while still in his mother’s womb. 16 And he will persuade many in Israel to convert and turn back to the Lord their God. 17 He will go before the Lord as a forerunner, with the same power and anointing as Elijah the prophet. He will be instrumental in turning the hearts of the fathers in tenderness back to their children and the hearts of the disobedient back to the wisdom of their righteous fathers. And he will prepare a united people who are ready for the Lord’s appearing.”

18 Zechariah asked the angel, “How do you expect me to believe this? I’m an old man and my wife is too old to give me a child. What sign can you give me to prove this will happen?”

19 Then the angel said, “I am Gabriel. I stand beside God himself. He has sent me to announce to you this good news. 20 But now, since you did not believe my words, you will be stricken silent and unable to speak until the day my words have been fulfilled at their appointed time and a child is born to you. That will be your sign!” Luke 1v11-20